By: Sarah Wilkens
From the very first day you find out that you are expecting a little one, your entire perspective of life changes. The increased responsibility of raising a child often stirs up intense feelings of self-doubt and insecurity. Once you give birth, those feelings are heightened because not only do you have a baby who needs you (at every moment of the day, it seems) you are also healing from giving birth; giving birth takes a toll on mothers, both, physically and mentally. All of this might factor into you questioning your worth. Understand that if you are questioning your ability, it means that you care and are genuinely doing your best. You are doing great; caring and doing your best is all you can do as a mother!
It is easy to allow self-doubt to impact how you feel. Especially when your social media newsfeeds are filled with friends, family members, and mommy bloggers, who, seemingly, are doing everything right. Now, more than ever, we are inundated with outside opinions of others because of social media. Do not compare yourself to other mothers. What everyone presents on social media is, merely, a snapshot of reality. Often, it is the other person’s highlight reel; you are not able to see the full picture of that person’s life.
Questioning yourself during moments of distress is common in motherhood. Insecurity and self-doubt can also creep in when you find yourself in a situation that you have difficulty navigating. The best way to handle this is to recognize that you are capable of overcoming any obstacle that you will face as a parent. Your desire to do what is best for your child will give you the motivation to figure out solutions to any problems that might arise.
As mothers, we often feel like we must carry the weight of the mental load all by ourselves, but we do not and we cannot! The “mental load” refers to the invisible labor that takes place in managing a household. When we do this, we become overwhelmed and stressed. When you find yourself feeling this way, you should take time to rest and meet your needs (physical and mental). You may feel guilty taking time to focus on yourself, but as a mother, you deserve to take the time you need. In fact, self-care is an essential aspect of motherhood. If you ensure that you meet your needs, you can better meet the needs of your family. In addition to prioritizing self-care, you should ask for help. There is nothing wrong with asking for help. You are still every bit of a good mom!
Rest assured that you are doing a great job. Being a mother is a very difficult responsibility. It requires you to be everything to everyone; you are the glue that holds your family together. Remember: your well-being is just as important as everyone else’s. So, take time to pamper yourself for all the hard work that you do throughout the day – you deserve it, and it will help you continue to be a great mother.
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